One of the things I often ponder while staring at my 3 month old baby while she sticks her fingers in her mouth and looks at me curiously, is , how in the world will I raise this human being to be a good person? Ok, I also am wondering how she can fit her entire hand in her mouth too, but that’s a topic for another day.
I know that my parenting journey will be full of mistakes and lessons learned on the way, yet in the end I can only pray that I instill some of the traits and qualities that my own parents and my husband’s parents tried to instill in us. Some of the most important things I found are:
- Forgive and Forget
- Whenever I had a problem with anyone or anything, my mother would listen to my struggles and rant with me, and then in the end say “Let’s drop it, thank them for what they’ve given you and let’s move on” This mentality has helped me so much in not holding on to issues that once happened. It’s about taking a step back and making everything a little less dramatic than how you were portraying it in your head, and that alone makes all the difference in keeping your own sanity and not caring about what others think or say to you at times.
- Never discriminate
- Something I learned from my parents is to always be humble no matter how high your economic or social status may be. That is to never joke about someone’s name or ethnicity/race/culture, and to take them for what they are on the inside instead of relying on generalizations to judge certain people. It’s also to never go down to someone’s level when they discriminate against you and always react as though it doesn’t bother you, because it shouldn’t.
- Thinking Good of Others
- This is one that my in laws are really good examples of. They always think positive of people and look on the good side of things. Something I may be critical of initially would be changed by the way they see things which is always a positive perspective. This is the key to their own happiness and I realize it is an excellent quality to have and to instill in my children by trying to be this way as well.
- Be wise and think before you speak
- My father always shows this one by example by staying silent in certain conversations and listening to the other person and then carefully explaining his point. You tend to listen to those who are speaking calmly and those who are definitely wise in their thoughts and actions.