1. Say Au’dubillah – say and seek refuge from the Shaytan. Remind yourself that anger is coming from the Shaytan. People will get defensive when you tell them to say that because they often forget that the source of anger is from the Shaytan. 

2. Be quiet. 

3. If standing, sit down. If sitting, lay down. Take this negative action and turn it into a positive action.

4. Focus on NOT getting angry. If you concentrate and don’t let your emotions get to you, you can train yourself to control it. (more…)

Image by darwin Bell on Flickr


I ran into a stranger and he passed by

“Oh Excuse me please” was my reply

He said “please excuse me too

I wasn’t watching for you”

We were very polite this stranger and I

We went on our way and said goodbye

But at home a different story is told

How we treat our loved ones, young and old

Later that day while cooking the evening meal

My son stood beside me very still

When I turned I nearly knocked him down

“Move out of the way” I said with a frown

He walked away his little heart broken

I didn’t realize how harshly I’d spoken

While I lay awake in bed

God’s still small voice came to me and said

While dealing with a stranger common courtesy you use

But the family you love you seem to abuse

Go and look on the kitchen floor

You’ll find some flowers there by the door

Those are the flowers he brought for you

He picked them  himself, pink, yellow and blue

He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise

You never saw the tears that filled his little eyes

By this time I felt very small

And now my tears began to fall

I quietly went and knelt by his bed

“Wake up little one wake up” I said

“Are these the flowers you picked for me?”

He smiled “I found them out by the tree

I picked them because they’re pretty like you

I knew you’d like them especially the blue”

I said “Son I am very sorry for the way I acted today

I shouldn’t have yelled at you that way”

He said “Oh mom that’s okay I love you anyway”

I said “Son I love you too and I do like the flowers especially the blue.”

This was a poem taken from the Husn-E-Ikhlaq (Good Character) Podcast by Dr. Farhat Hashmi. 


Photo by

This past Eid-ul-Adha we attended a potluck dinner at my cousin’s house.  It is  so different going to these dinners now that I am a wife and mother. When I attended these dinners before I used to just play with the kids and not really care whether I taught them anything or how anything I said could be perceived.  In other words I didn’t really look into my actions as having any influence on the minds of young impressionable children.  Now I realize everything I do can and does have an impact on them.  I am someone they can potentially look up to..who would’ve thought?! =)

An incident happened at Eid that made me realize the raising of our kids will be so different than how we were raised, because this generation is different both internally and externally (social influences) than the ones our parents or grandparents raised.

Image by nick chapman on Flickr

At the dinner there was an argument that occurred between the boys and the girls on whose turn it was to play the Wii.  The two young boys said it was their turn and of course one of the boys’ sister went to her mother and said “He won’t let us play the Wii, Mommy.”  This erupted in a fully loaded argument by the boy explaining how it was their turn to play and the parents trying to frustratingly come up with a solution that would appease both sides of the party. (more…)

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

bismi-llāhi r-raḥmāni r-raḥīm

In the name of God, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

If you’ve ever watched Pakistani dramas you will see something similar running through many of them and that is one of injustice and this injustice is usually done to a helpless woman with no backing.  Now when I used to watch these, I would always be sarcastic and very naively wonder why can’t she just leave or do something.  Now years later, having learned some things about the deen and about the world, I realize what injustice is and what our duty is when dealing with people who are unjust.

Injustice is taking anything and putting it out of its place, whether it be someone’s rights and things or it be your own.  There’s the obvious kind of injustice such as taking someone’s house away or inheritance away without due cause and then there’s little injustices that often occur daily in our lives and we must try to diminish these before we are asked about them by the Owner of the heavens and Earth, Al-Adl (the Just).  What follows is a list of injustices that can happen in our personal, marital, or work life.  This post was inspired by a lecture by Dr. Farhat Hashmi in which she encouraged us to write down the injustices that can and do happen in our lives so that we are aware of them and try our best to curb them.

For Allah subhanahu wa ta ‘ala (Exalted is He) says in a Hadith qudsi “O My slaves, I have forbidden myself oppression and I have made it between you forbidden, so do not oppress one another.”  Muslim

Injustice with Allah (swt).

1.  Not obeying him in all matters

2.  Delaying acts of obedience (i.e. salah–prayer)

3.  Expecting from other than Him

4.  Not making Dua’ (supplication) to Him when you are in need

Injustice with yourself.

Image by Marcia O’Connor on Flickr

1. Feeding your body unhealthy food

2. Feeding your soul only entertainment verses feeding it salah and Quran.

3. Not taking time out to rest when tired.

4. Being Loud (zulm with your tongue)


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